Archive for January, 2010

The man I loved most ~ My Hero

January 23rd, 2010

I thought in the 23 years of my life, I have gone through enough heartbreaks and moments of devastation that it has made me a stronger person.

How wrong I am! Because no one is prepared for this kind of heartbreak. No one should need to go through this kind of hurt. God should not be so cruel, to let us see the person we loved most getting more and more fragile day by day.

The man I once believe is a superhero, the man I have always known that he would protect me from any harm, getting weaker day by day. Because of the alien that invaded his body, and also because of our own negligence, for not able to notice and anticipate the attacks of the aliens.

I am definitely not prepared for all this. No one will understand how I feel when I see his fragile body; his reflex getting slower, his breathing getting faster and his soul getting wasted away.

I know how he feels when I look at him. He thinks he is useless. He actually despises himself, I think. For being in this kind of state after being the man of the house for more than 30 years.

But despite all this, despite the foreign entity that is slowly conquering his body and soul, I still think of him as my hero. The only difference is that my hero needed my care and protection now.

And I am not going to let go so soon, no matter what the outcome is.

The Gift of Time

January 23rd, 2010

I have always been preoccupied with time.

But now, I am seeing time in a bigger context. I have to admit that I am always rushing to do my works, rushing to meet datelines, and rushing to chase more time.

Now that I have a real deadline, I really feel that I do not have enough time to complete the job. The job of being a good daughter.  Time is running away from me, leaving me, and depriving me of the most important role of all, a role of a daughter.

I wish to have more time….I wish to be able to spend all my time with you… I do not wish to be anywhere else, do anything else other than being by your side.

But I know I can’t. I have had this thought to stay by your side all the time, but I know you wouldn’t approve. You would see me as incapable, and you will see yourself as useless too.

 And so I abandon the thought. I will be brave, I will do what needed to done. And I will keep on buying time. I only need you not to leave me, because I couldn’t imagine the life without you.

我擦干了眼泪!

January 9th, 2010

擦干了眼泪,就勇敢向前冲!!

虽然时间从来不等待,可是我们会把握剩下的每一分,每一秒,珍惜和你在一起的每一刻.

Be Strong

January 8th, 2010

Things has gone drastically bad in these 2 days. But we will keep on fighting and we will not give up.

We beg you not to give up on yourself too. It pained me to hear you talking as if you are the man of our past.

You will always be in our heart, now and forever.

We will fight, till the end of time!! And we will WIN!!